OK, WHICH ONE OF YOU UNFOLLOWED ME?!? Oh.. yeah.. right. Nevermind.
Ok, people.. Words with Friends. I know I’m late to this party, but I wanna check it out. I’m pvaras. Toss me your usernames and let’s get all wordy and shit.
I had a reality check this weekend regarding my weight. I need to lose some.
It’s almost as though I’ve been living this Emperors New Clothes fantasy where nobody ever mentioned it to me, and I just lived my life in this happy little unhealthy bubble. I hate making these types of posts because it almost always leads to the declaration of “I’m on a diet right now!” and every one’s all supportive and I feel good about myself and then the diet and exercise stops.
I’ll I’m saying is that I realize I need to lose some weight.
There’s not a day that goes by when I don’t consider myself lucky. Of course, there’s also not a day that goes by that I piss and moan about some ridiculous thing, either. But I know exactly what I have. And I’m thankful.
We may not all celebrate Christmas. But we do celebrate family, friendships, our good fortunes, and all the little things that help get us through the day.
Merry Christmas to all of you, and thanks for inviting me into your lives. You all absolutely help get me through my day.
In a world.. where a man fights to celebrate a wonderful woman’s birthday in the face of utter chaos… Take a journey with Regular Joe Patrick as he realizes that nothing he can do is good enough… Watch as he wishes Lynn the very best of Birthdays.. as the world around him CRUMBLES. Witness the DEVASTATION that one man overcomes as he fights to wish the most AWESOME woman in the world a happy birthday..
*cut to mountain top, where our HERO stands on a small patch of ground, surrounded by rivers of lava, lightning flashing and small meteors falling from the sky, as he screams to the heavens*
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PENBLETH!!!
*probably not coming to a theater near you.
Happy Birthday to the coolest Science doing, Video Game playing, British Actor loving woman I know. I hope your day is Firth-tacular!
Love ya loads
Judy is one of those “1 or 2 true friends”. ;)
I won’t go into it now…but there have been times that we have been on the same wavelength, despite being half a continent apart…and I SWEAR there were times in high school and college where we would communicate without speaking…
When you’ve got that kind of connection, it’s hard to break.
My other OTHER sister!!!
These are two of my favorite people in the world. Period.
I am insanely excited to give my kids their Christmas gifts. I could give a shit if I get anything this year, but I honestly really dig giving.
One of the reasons I love my job is because, for the past hour, I’ve had my earphones in and I’ve been air guitaring, singing, and generally rocking out to Rush’s 2112 (Live. It’s so much better live. Album is All the World’s a Stage) and the CEO and my boss have walked by my desk and not even given me a sideways glance as it’s just business as usual for me.
I have no idea why I dressed up for work today, as I can get away with jeans and sneaks for the rest of the year.
I sat with my train buddy today that I haven’t seen in a while. We were both laughing so hard while we were catching up that we were in tears. I miss her.
I still need to get my hotel room for SnarkNYC.
I’m hungry but I have no idea what to eat for lunch.
The Tumblr spell checker has no concept of the word “Guitaring”. Or, for that matter, “Tumblr”.
There’s lots of porn on my dashboard tonight. If some of you guys start selling discount electronics and talking sexy to me, this will be the only site I’ll ever need.
I took Jon to see TRON: Legacy this weekend. This was pretty significant for me as I was able to share something with my son that I enjoyed as a boy even younger than him. I’ve been squealing about this movie even since the first teasers came out last year.
The original was a mind blowing trip for me. I was a nerdish kid who was already into these weird things called “computers”. The movie itself had a completely mind blowing story, with a concept and special effects that had never been done before. Plus, my older brother took me to see it, so it was a special memory for that as well. Even now, I have a collectors item rare out of print DVD. I watched it before I went to see the sequel.
Jon and I sat in the theater, watching previews, then the lights darkened. Jon elbowed me and said “Dad! TROON!”, excited not for himself; he was happy for me that I was finally going to see this.. this glorious sequel.. l was beyond excited!!
And then.. yeah. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone.. in fact, if you have no knowledge of the original then you may dig the eye candy.. but, ugh. Way to crap on a memory, Disney. Some things made no sense! why would a “program” living in a virtual world need food? Was that an umbrella? does it rain there? who the fuck would program rain inside a computer? the list goes on and on. Sure, the entire concept is far fetched and crazy, but come on! at least in the original, with it’s cheesy graphics and Journey soundtrack, things made sense!
This makes me wary to see Disney’s new animated movie spectacular “Mickey Mouse cock punches your Dad then has his way with your Mom 3D”.
Google Voice.. are we still doing this? we should still do this. He it is:
Now you have it. Easy, vocal access to me. I’m giddy with anticipation.
I rarely hit up the food carts for lunch. It’s usually a gamble to whether the food is good or not, and if I’ll be “indisposed” for rest of the afternoon. The only exception to this rule is when your drunk. There’s nothing better than meat on the street at midnight in front of Grand Central.
Today I took the gamble and got rice. What makes the meal so remarkable is that, the cheezy little salad they put on the side was made of the freshest produce I think I’ve ever had in my life. The lettuce was green and crunchy, and the tomato was a beautiful shade of red, and was nice and firm.
As to the rest of the gamble.. well, my next post may be from the reading room. We’ll just have to wait and see.
Intangible: I tend to always see the bright side of things and use my humor to lighten tense situations.
Tangible: I’ve been told I have a nice smile.
Working in New York City makes me absolutely dependent on the subway system. Sure, there are cabs and sidewalks, but I usually reserve these options for times when I’m drunk or cold. Since I’ve been working in the city for a few years now, I’ve learned the ins and outs of underground transportation. For those of you who may be headed to SnarkNYC in January, you may want to remember / consider the following when zipping back and forth from the hotel to your daily destinations:
1. When the subway factors into your transportation plans, you WILL be late. This could be for a number of reasons.. train traffic ahead of you, crowds, or a late train. Plan accordingly.
2. There are rats in the subway system. You’ll see them scurrying about on the tracks. Now, they may be gross, but they won’t bother you. This is usually not a big deal. However.. if you see a large number of rats all running together, as if they are running away from something, FOLLOW THEM.
3. One of the great things about visiting New York is experiencing all of the sights and smells. Unfortunately many of these will be experienced on the subway. People tend to eat, drink, and show off their unbelievably bad hygiene on the subway. If you experience this you can try to move, but this is ultimately futile. Grin and bear it.
4. Many street musicians see the subway as sort of a Madison Square Garden on wheels. No matter how crowded the subway is, some aspiring Dylan will squeeze in with his guitar. You have two choices here. You can enjoy the music, or you can put on your headphones and ignore. Keep in mind that these performances are not free; if you are caught enjoying the music you WILL be shaken down for an artists fee.
5. Many homeless people call the subway home. You can usually see them napping in one of the seats. *try* not to sit too close to them, In fact, it’s best to avoid them all together. Like a sleeping bear, you’ll want to avoid waking them. At all costs.
6. If you’re a man, don’t sit. Come on, dude. In your short trip a woman, child, or elderly person will eventually enter the train and you’ll feel like a dick sitting while they stand.
7. Don’t make eye contact with ANYONE. This is considered a hostile act in NYC and is grounds for getting capped in your ass. Do not provoke native New Yorkers in this way. You may come from a friendly part of the country, but please keep your pleasant hellos and other warm greetings to yourself. If a stranger on the subway is too nice to us, we get confused and frightened and tend to act accordingly.*
*NOTE - Strangely enough, it’s ok to ask for directions. New Yorkers are proud of their city and enjoy showing it off to out of towners.
In conclusion, be respectful, plan ahead, and mind your business. Not just good ideas for the subway, but for life in general. Keep these things in mind and you’ll have a swell visit to the Big Apple.
I can’t join the tat meme because I have zero tats on my body. Not a one. No teardrops, bat signals, tribal bands, Chinese or Japanese characters, nothing. It’s not that I’m against it, I just can’t decide on something that will be cool now, but make me look like a total tool in a few years.
…the panty game. Due to an unspoken “don’t be pants-less” policy in the office, I can’t really join this meme. I will say, however, that you guys are significantly improving my Monday.
So, yeah. Yanks!.. Uh, I mean, thanks! (that’s not even a joke. I just totally slipped there and typed that. I’m leaving it to prove to you guys how much I love this meme).
I’d pour all of my unlimited funds into cloning technology and give myself. I’ll be the gift that keeps on giving.
Day two of weekend bender going smoothly. Just got home and nicely buzzed. So, what’s new around here?
What’s your deal? I know that you think I should be distracted by the fact that it’s Friday, and that I should just be happy with that. Well not today. Actually, you’ve been hiding behind this whole “Oh, I’m not here yet, but look over there! is that Friday?!” thing for way too long. It’s time to start pulling your weight. You think you are so goddam special just because you’re 5:00 PM. Sure, people are happy to see you, but you’ve been coasting on your perceived popularity for too long. It’s time for you to start pulling your weight.
Stop dicking around and get over here. NOW.
Happy Birthday Raiselm!!!
What’s the deal with all the awesome people having birthdays today?
Happy birthday, dear. I hope you have an awesome day! I’m going drinking tonight, and I plan on rasing 1, 2 or 12 in your honor. Please send me your # so that I can drunk dial you as the night progresses and I decline.
Happy Birthday! :-)
Happy Birthday Hemi!!!
You are so awesome it excites me to even be in the same social network as you. We’ve been buds for a while now; I hope it lasts for en even longer while. :-)
Have a great day!!!
ME: I need a snack.
CO-WORKER: I got carrots.
ME: Get the Fuck out of here. Carrots. *snort* I mean, seriously. What the fuck.
CO-WORKER: I got granola bars too.
ME: Granola? What the fuck man!?
CO-WORKER: The granola bars have chocolate chips.
ME: Cool. Thanks bro.
Hi fellow beer lovah!
Things are good, thanks! I certainly can’t complain. My boiler gave me a bit more of an issue today, so I worked from home and had the repair guy come and fix it correctly. Not exactly a good time for the heater to go, considering it’s going be like 20 here tonight.
I’m not sure about the fish. I may leave Sid in his tank, and fill the other one with more social fish like Platys and Mollys. I get the feeling that Sid is digging his own pad and won’t want to share. Will I share my beer with the fish? totally! I set up the tanks in my office so I can take a mental break and watch them swim about while I’m working. They in turn can chill out and watch my while I drink my favorite beer. Win win for everyone!
See? asking questions is easy! ;-)
I’m beyond psyched to see Tron Legacy. I have the original on DVD and watched it about two weeks ago. My older brother took me to see the original, and now I’m taking him and my boys. Legacy, indeed.
My weight is starting to bum me out.
It’s getting cold. I. FUCKING. HATE. THE. COLD.
I like my job.
I don’t get why everybody on Family Guy beats up on Meg. I mean, I’ve seen way worse cartoon ladies.. Cruella Deville, The Wicked Witch, Bratz Dolls..
I haven’t picked up my guitar in a long time.
Last night I had a dream that I was in a garage. Not a fancy garage, but your run of the mill old school “we don’t hook none of them computers to your car, we drive it and figure out what the problem is” kind of places. I vaguely remember seeing a grizzled old man standing under a car that was on a lift. A lantern was hanging from the undercarriage. There were oil spots on the ground.
While the dream was visual, it was the smell of the garage that made it so lifelike. It had a strong smell of burning oil. And it was constant. In the dream, I walked around the various cars that were being fixed. I touched one. It was cold. I stepped outside of the garage, and still that strong smell. Something jarred me awake. The garage was gone, but the smell was still there.
It was then I realized that the smell was not a part of the dream, but the smell must have triggered the dream. My house had a strong odor of oil. I lept out of bed, threw my sweats on, and ran downstairs. I went to the boiler room and immediately hit the emergency off switch. After circling the boiler, looking it up and down, I realized that I knew the inner workings of the Starship Enterprise better than I knew the inner workings of a fucking boiler. So I called the repair guy. Long story short, he came hours later, cleaned it, split, and I made it into the office at 1:00 this afternoon.
This whole experience has taught me a few things. One, I need to learn more about boilers. Two, I’m glad I paid extra for the “Platinum” service plan from the oil company. Three, dreams are really creepy, and really amazing things. And four?
I know way, way too much about the Starship Enterprise.
It sounds awesome. Tomorrow I hit the distributor and pick up my beer. I’m going to search for something unusual and amazing. I can’t wait until we can tip a few together!
Sid is sick.
Last week I put a heater in the tank to make sure the water was warm enough for him. Since then, all he does is hide behind the heater. He’s not the swimmy little bastard he usually is. He’s not really eating like he used to. He basically has a general malaise to him. So I went out for dinner tonight, and when I came back he looked even more listless. I did some research to see what his problem could be. After looking up countless fish diseases, all of his symptoms seem to point to depression. Yes, this is a real fish disease.
Um, before he got here he was living in a pill bottle in a fucking Wal Mart. He comes here, gets a huge tank, tastefully decorated, with a warm Caribbean water temp. He gets only the best Betta pellets, and gets treated to delicious blood worms a few times a week (at $5 a clip), and he’s depressed? Jesus H. Christ. Out of all the fish in the ocean, I get the worlds only emo fish.
So now, I have to go out and buy him a new tank decoration, and spend the rest of the day telling him how good looking he is and whatever else a fish needs to hear to boost it’s fucking ego. Maybe tonight I’ll just jam some Cure in my office and let him contemplate the meaning of it all.
I shoulda got a goldfish.
Thanks for the kind words tonight guys. I needed to vent. Thanks for listening.
1. Get a room at the ParkCentral hotel Friday and Saturday night for SnarkNYC.
2. From now until SnarkNYC, eat nothing but salad for lunch.
3. Light lunch will be followed by a sensible dinner.
4. Alternate daily treadmill/insanity workout/some activity that gets my ass moving.
5. Practice hugging/rubbing/air kissing/real kissing/tongue kissing.
6. Prepare my liver by drinking more than usual.
7. Show up to SnarkNYC. PREPARED.